Be a social butterfly...

I don’t claim to be a child-care expert.  I have an A-Level in child psychology and make it my business to research issues that may effect my daughter, but ultimately…I’m just a parent who is muddling through with love and instinct.   Children aren’t delivered to you complete with instructions and in the same way that every child is different, every parent is different; although we can give and take advice, ultimately all we can ever do is our best and hope that it’s enough.

Being a Mum is hard.  Motherhood comes with delirious joys and paralysing fears; sleepless nights and kodak moments.  I don’t think we should berate ourselves too much when we make mistakes, but we shouldn’t congratulate ourselves too much either; a lot of our successes are based on good luck and the marvels that are our children.  However every now and again my little lady does some thing that makes me feel so proud of her and in turn, proud of myself.  This is one of those times.

 

Me, Mum, Phill.  Together forever.

As  regular readers will know, I recently got married!!   My husband and I were very careful with Beth’s feelings around our marriage.  We gave her the opportunity to discuss any concerns she might have aswell as anything that she really wanted to be included in our wedding day and indeed in our life as a family going forward.   We explained that she was losing NOTHING, but gaining a step-father: this was a necessary reassurance as she and I had been such a strong unit when I was single, we didn’t want her to feel that our relationship would change.

Mummy, At first it was you & me together forever and ever!  But now it’s even better

I think the best thing we can do to alleviate worry in our children is listen to them and allow them to have some control.  Beth has been a real player in the organisation of our big day, helping with crafts and shopping, giving her opinions on readings and flowers.  In the spirit of the exchange of rings, Phill gave Beth a beautiful locket on our Wedding Day, hoping that it goes some way towards symbolising his commitment to her aswell as me.  During our Wedding ceremony, Bethany read Shakespeare’s Sonnet 116 and brought the congregation to tears.  She read those words in a way that an adult would struggle to match and she is only 9 years old.   I was so proud.

Me & you & Phill.  I love you both , now and always will.

Last night, quite without any suggestions or encouragement from Phill and I, Beth made and presented us with this card.  I am overwhelmed by her maturity, her eloquence and her love.   The sentiments in this card are exactly how Phill and I hoped to help her to feel about our new family and once over the initial outpouring of love and praise, we couldn’t help but give ourselves a little pat on the back.

What a lovely girl we have and what a lucky couple we are. x

Love Rachel

xxx

Be a social butterfly...

  • Lizpurkis1966

    aww, that’s so lovely, you are so very blessed to have each other. We are blessed to know you, even if only slightly for now.

    • Anonymous

      too many blessings to count x

  • Brandi Dailey

    I do so many things wrong as a parent. I forget the diapers for the diaper bag, take kids to the store with no shoes because they’re lost..again. They’re sometimes grubby and have messy hands, but on those moments when they, without any prompting or encouragement, give care and love to each other or a friend, when they are genuinely concerned or happy then I know I’m doing something right. Its the times when they are all snuggled together or hiding under their bed reading books sharing a flashlight at night (when they’re supposed to be in bed) that encourage me and remind me that I don’t have to be perfect I just have to show them how to love. You obviously have done a wonderful job of teaching your little one how to love and be open and confident when life does what it does best, send changes your way.

    • Anonymous

      Brandi our child seems to have permanently knotty hair…it does not matter what I do!!! She also paints her fingernails without me realising and ends up at school with chipped polish that I only spot on the way out and I think ARGHHHH….what will the mums/teachers/world think??? I then I realise I don’t care. She thinks we’re 2 people who love her and keep her safe and try to make her happy and that’s all that matters. ps. A bit of grubbiness never hurt anyone ;-P